Starting Weight/BMI: 217.5/33.1 (obese)
Last Week Weight/BMI: 203.0/30.9 (obese)
Current Weight/BMI: 196.5/29.9 (overweight)
Change This Week: - 6.5
Total Lost: 21.0
Pounds to Goal: 56.5
Damn.
Daaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaammmmnnnnn!
I rocked the socks off of last week. I'm thrilled! I'm no longer obese! I've lost over twenty pounds! I'm back in the 100s, where I will stay for the rest of my life.
Here's my daily caloric breakdown for the week.
Monday: 2032 (consumed) - 121 (burned) = 1911
Tuesday: 1785 (consumed) - 153 (burned) = 1632
Wednesday: 1438 (consumed) - 175 (burned) = 1263
Thursday: 2031
Friday: 1759
Saturday: 2031
Sunday: 1335
Average net caloric consumption for the week? 1709
Word.
Gaining a pound last week definitely made me more focused and determined this week. I'm not trying to do anything extreme, and I'm definitely not trying to lose more than two pounds per week. I'm just trying to ensure that my calories stay at or below 1800 each day. This is reasonable, this is doable long term, and this is a good starting point.
I hadn't really planned on returning to exercise this week. On Monday I just decided to try to walk a mile to see what sort of shape I was in. Turns out I am in rather terrible shape. It took me over twenty minutes to walk one mile while pushing Sweet Pea in her stroller. Last summer it took me less than fifteen minutes to walk a mile with a much heavier Niblet riding in the stroller.
I have a lot of work to do.
I still have almost two months to go before I begin the Couch to 5k program to train for the 5k I will be running on December 9. I've decided that, in the meantime, I'll start lifting some light weights at home. I have a stability ball app on my iPhone that has three beginning workouts, three intermediate workouts, and three advanced workouts. Tonight I'll take my measurements and, this week, I'll try to complete the three beginning workouts. I'm very interested to see just how strong I am (or am not) after such a long hiatus from exercise.
I'll also get some photos up, too, when I am able to spare the time to take them.
Other than that I'll keep measuring and weighing my food, counting calories and keeping my net consumption to 1800/day for the week. I'll continue to take one day, one choice, at a time. I'll continue to think positively.
Most importantly, I'll not expect the same results one week from today. Losing 6.5 pounds in one week is not replicable. It's not realistic. It's not particularly desirable, either. There's a part of me that can't help but think--if I do this again, I'll be in the 180s in 8 days!! I need to focus on patience. I need to do this slowly and steadily.
I need to do this permanently.
Monday, August 20, 2012
Monday, August 13, 2012
Week 4: 203.0 Pounds
Starting Weight/BMI: 217.5/33.1 (obese)
Last Week Weight/BMI: 202.0/30.7 (obese)
Current Weight/BMI: 203/30.9 (obese)
Change This Week: + 1.0
Total Lost: 14.5
Pounds to Goal: 63.0
F@ck!
And no...I don't really want to talk about it, but I will.
This week fits my usual diet pattern perfectly.
I began Monday. I started the day with a clean, healthy diet but went to the county fair with my family in the evening and made responsible choices. I consumed 2078 calories but burned an estimated 577 calories by walking at the zoo all morning and at the fair all evening. Net calories: 1501.
Tuesday, despite my morning breakfast meeting over the best croissants in Cleveland, I managed to consume a relatively clean 1758 calories.
Wednesday? 1782 clean calories.
Thursday. Thursday, Thursday, Thursday. I slept for shit thanks to my little Sweet Pea waking up longer than usual at night. I was, in a word, exhausted. And I have a trial coming up that is making me sweat bullets. And all I wanted was cake, bagels, and donuts. And wouldn't you know that, when I dropped the Niblet off at his sitter, she gave me three thick slices of squishy beer bread. And I ate them. All three of them. Calories consumed? Somewhere in the neighborhood of 2578.
And Friday I did just great until I joined my family out for dinner at a greasy spoon for dinner and had fried eggs and American cheese on a bagel with a side of french fries dipped in creamy ranch dressing. Calories: 2549.
Saturday I had the usual, healthful, clean breakfast and lunch. Then the fam and I went to our favorite Mexican joint for dinner. And I was exhausted again on Saturday, and I was home alone trying to get Sweet Pea to sleep. And I was at my wit's end. And so, to help matters, I scarfed two pieces of almond shortbread. And then I had some banana bread with cream cheese. And by some, I mean two thick slices. Calories: a whopping 3414.
And then there was Sunday. I started with a delicious, nutrient packed smoothie in a bowl (soy milk, protein powder, 1/2 banana, blueberries, and spinach) topped with Cheerios and granola. 452 calories of deliciousness. And then we decided to go to the fair again. And I ate six, deep fried mini donuts, some of the Niblet's cheese fries, five deep fried pierogi with sour cream, and an ear of buttery, salty corn on the cob. I didn't even bother calculating calories.
The carnage continued at home, where I ate banana bread immediately after coming home from the fair. I had beans and rice for dinner, which I followed with a caramel sundae from Dairy Queen, a piece of corn bread, and a bite of brownie. And then when I prepared the Niblet's lunch for the sitter's house today, I ate the rest of the mac and cheese that did not fit into his lunchbox.
W. T. F.
So, in a way, I suppose I should feel lucky that I only gained one pound this week, yes? And I suppose I am. And really, if you look at many of my meals on my very worst days, I did a great job packing in the nutrients, so there's the silver lining.
But for the love of Whomeverneedslove, what the hell is my problem?
My immediate instinct is, of course, to promise that I will eat clean and "perfectly" and exercise when I can until I hit this week's goal of 198 pounds, and I know that I could probably do that. But that reaction has led to some pretty spectacular failures in the past, and I need to do things differently if I want to finally succeed here.
So, again, I will focus on one. Day. At. A. Time. I will take each choice at a time, and I will try to make the best choice. And if I fail to make the best choice, I will make the best choice the next time I have a decision to make.
But what I keep promising myself, what I need to keep promising myself, is this:
I will not quit. I will not quit. I will not quit. This will work. This will work. This will work.
I can do this.
(Right??)
Last Week Weight/BMI: 202.0/30.7 (obese)
Current Weight/BMI: 203/30.9 (obese)
Change This Week: + 1.0
Total Lost: 14.5
Pounds to Goal: 63.0
F@ck!
And no...I don't really want to talk about it, but I will.
This week fits my usual diet pattern perfectly.
I began Monday. I started the day with a clean, healthy diet but went to the county fair with my family in the evening and made responsible choices. I consumed 2078 calories but burned an estimated 577 calories by walking at the zoo all morning and at the fair all evening. Net calories: 1501.
Tuesday, despite my morning breakfast meeting over the best croissants in Cleveland, I managed to consume a relatively clean 1758 calories.
Wednesday? 1782 clean calories.
Thursday. Thursday, Thursday, Thursday. I slept for shit thanks to my little Sweet Pea waking up longer than usual at night. I was, in a word, exhausted. And I have a trial coming up that is making me sweat bullets. And all I wanted was cake, bagels, and donuts. And wouldn't you know that, when I dropped the Niblet off at his sitter, she gave me three thick slices of squishy beer bread. And I ate them. All three of them. Calories consumed? Somewhere in the neighborhood of 2578.
And Friday I did just great until I joined my family out for dinner at a greasy spoon for dinner and had fried eggs and American cheese on a bagel with a side of french fries dipped in creamy ranch dressing. Calories: 2549.
Saturday I had the usual, healthful, clean breakfast and lunch. Then the fam and I went to our favorite Mexican joint for dinner. And I was exhausted again on Saturday, and I was home alone trying to get Sweet Pea to sleep. And I was at my wit's end. And so, to help matters, I scarfed two pieces of almond shortbread. And then I had some banana bread with cream cheese. And by some, I mean two thick slices. Calories: a whopping 3414.
And then there was Sunday. I started with a delicious, nutrient packed smoothie in a bowl (soy milk, protein powder, 1/2 banana, blueberries, and spinach) topped with Cheerios and granola. 452 calories of deliciousness. And then we decided to go to the fair again. And I ate six, deep fried mini donuts, some of the Niblet's cheese fries, five deep fried pierogi with sour cream, and an ear of buttery, salty corn on the cob. I didn't even bother calculating calories.
The carnage continued at home, where I ate banana bread immediately after coming home from the fair. I had beans and rice for dinner, which I followed with a caramel sundae from Dairy Queen, a piece of corn bread, and a bite of brownie. And then when I prepared the Niblet's lunch for the sitter's house today, I ate the rest of the mac and cheese that did not fit into his lunchbox.
W. T. F.
So, in a way, I suppose I should feel lucky that I only gained one pound this week, yes? And I suppose I am. And really, if you look at many of my meals on my very worst days, I did a great job packing in the nutrients, so there's the silver lining.
But for the love of Whomeverneedslove, what the hell is my problem?
My immediate instinct is, of course, to promise that I will eat clean and "perfectly" and exercise when I can until I hit this week's goal of 198 pounds, and I know that I could probably do that. But that reaction has led to some pretty spectacular failures in the past, and I need to do things differently if I want to finally succeed here.
So, again, I will focus on one. Day. At. A. Time. I will take each choice at a time, and I will try to make the best choice. And if I fail to make the best choice, I will make the best choice the next time I have a decision to make.
But what I keep promising myself, what I need to keep promising myself, is this:
I will not quit. I will not quit. I will not quit. This will work. This will work. This will work.
I can do this.
(Right??)
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Week 3: 202.0 Pounds
Starting Weight/BMI: 217.5/33.1 (obese)
Last Week Weight/BMI: 204.0/31.0 (obese)
Change This Week: -2.0
Current Weight/BMI: 202.0/30.7 (obese)
Total Lost: 15.5
Pounds to Goal: 62.0
I lost two pounds this week. I'm content with that, especially considering that, though my good days were very, very good, my bad days were f*cking awful. Here is my calorie breakdown for the week:
Monday 7/30: 2280
Tuesday 7/31: 1700
Wednesday 8/1: 1772
Thursday 8/2: 3863 (!)
Friday 8/3: 3424 (!!)
Saturday: 1792
Sunday: 1540
This brings my average daily caloric consumption for the week to 2339. The fact that I'm able to eat this much, not exercise, and still lose two pounds per week is very promising. For one thing, I have tons of room for error. For another, I have a lot of room to cut calories and burn calories through exercise once my weight loss begins to stall.
Eating out was definitely a problem, and was the cause of my excessive calorie consumption on Monday, Thursday, and Friday.
This week I'll try and keep my calories down. I'll continue to track and ensure that I'm getting plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables each day. I'll continue to drink plenty of water, and I'll continue to prevent myself from getting overwhelmed or disheartened by taking one day, one hour, one choice at a time.
My body is still not ready for exercise. I spent a lot of time with my family yesterday walking at the zoo and at the county fair and I'm paying the price today in the form of some very sore joints and muscles. For now, I'm content to focus on food until the weight loss slows and until my body is feeling ready for exercise.
One day, one choice, at a time. I can do this.
Last Week Weight/BMI: 204.0/31.0 (obese)
Change This Week: -2.0
Current Weight/BMI: 202.0/30.7 (obese)
Total Lost: 15.5
Pounds to Goal: 62.0
I lost two pounds this week. I'm content with that, especially considering that, though my good days were very, very good, my bad days were f*cking awful. Here is my calorie breakdown for the week:
Monday 7/30: 2280
Tuesday 7/31: 1700
Wednesday 8/1: 1772
Thursday 8/2: 3863 (!)
Friday 8/3: 3424 (!!)
Saturday: 1792
Sunday: 1540
This brings my average daily caloric consumption for the week to 2339. The fact that I'm able to eat this much, not exercise, and still lose two pounds per week is very promising. For one thing, I have tons of room for error. For another, I have a lot of room to cut calories and burn calories through exercise once my weight loss begins to stall.
Eating out was definitely a problem, and was the cause of my excessive calorie consumption on Monday, Thursday, and Friday.
This week I'll try and keep my calories down. I'll continue to track and ensure that I'm getting plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables each day. I'll continue to drink plenty of water, and I'll continue to prevent myself from getting overwhelmed or disheartened by taking one day, one hour, one choice at a time.
My body is still not ready for exercise. I spent a lot of time with my family yesterday walking at the zoo and at the county fair and I'm paying the price today in the form of some very sore joints and muscles. For now, I'm content to focus on food until the weight loss slows and until my body is feeling ready for exercise.
One day, one choice, at a time. I can do this.
Saturday, August 4, 2012
It Is Easy to Get Discouraged...
...when a work lunch of cheesy baked pasta with garlic bread and cheesy salad turns into an after lunch snack of leftover pasta, garlic bread, and mac and cheese pizza...
...which turns into a dinner of leftover cheesy baked pasta...
...which turns into three chocolate, chocolate chip cookies for dessert...
...which leads to pound cake and cookies and white pizza during a visit with family the next day...
...which leads to cheesy, fatty Mexican food for dinner...
...and a bowl of ice cream for dessert...
...and a higher number on the scale the next morning.
It's easy to get discouraged...
...especially when I have so far to go...
...and my self-image is in the toilet...
...especially when I find out that Mr. Kazoo spend Happy Hour at the Titled Kilt...
...and I realize that at 34 years old and with two kids...
...and with a body that LOOKS 34 years old and has my kids written all over it...
...that I'll never be (at least physically) exactly what I want to be.
It's easy to get discouraged.
I have to remind myself of this:
I'm a mother now.
A mother of a little girl.
I can't define myself by how I look...or how I don't...
...and I have to teach her that she is so much more than that.
I can be healthy and, even if I don't look like the motivational fitness posters on Pinterest or Tumblr, I can still look and feel great.
...and I can't give up.
I need to take each day, each hour, each choice...at a time.
Just one choice at a time.
If I keep making more healthful choices than poor choices...
...and if I never, not EVER give up...
...I can get where I want to be.
It might not happen as quickly as I'd like it to be.
It might be difficult.
It might be ugly...
...but I can't...
...I WON'T...
...quit.
Not ever.
...which turns into a dinner of leftover cheesy baked pasta...
...which turns into three chocolate, chocolate chip cookies for dessert...
...which leads to pound cake and cookies and white pizza during a visit with family the next day...
...which leads to cheesy, fatty Mexican food for dinner...
...and a bowl of ice cream for dessert...
...and a higher number on the scale the next morning.
It's easy to get discouraged...
...especially when I have so far to go...
...and my self-image is in the toilet...
...especially when I find out that Mr. Kazoo spend Happy Hour at the Titled Kilt...
...and I realize that at 34 years old and with two kids...
...and with a body that LOOKS 34 years old and has my kids written all over it...
...that I'll never be (at least physically) exactly what I want to be.
It's easy to get discouraged.
I have to remind myself of this:
I'm a mother now.
A mother of a little girl.
I can't define myself by how I look...or how I don't...
...and I have to teach her that she is so much more than that.
I can be healthy and, even if I don't look like the motivational fitness posters on Pinterest or Tumblr, I can still look and feel great.
...and I can't give up.
I need to take each day, each hour, each choice...at a time.
Just one choice at a time.
If I keep making more healthful choices than poor choices...
...and if I never, not EVER give up...
...I can get where I want to be.
It might not happen as quickly as I'd like it to be.
It might be difficult.
It might be ugly...
...but I can't...
...I WON'T...
...quit.
Not ever.
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